Sex and Birth Control After Having a Baby

When can we have sex again?

• There's no magic date. Many providers suggest waiting until bleeding has slowed and any tear or incision has healed, often around 4-6 weeks, but some people feel ready sooner and many much later.
• Ready means your body and your mind. Tiredness, touched-out feelings, feeding, body changes and worry about pain are all normal reasons to wait. Closeness doesn't have to mean intercourse.

Making it more comfortable

• Go slowly and use plenty of lubricant. Low estrogen while breastfeeding often makes the vagina dry and thin; a water- or silicone-based lube helps, and your provider can suggest vaginal moisturizers or a local estrogen cream if needed.
• Choose positions where the person who gave birth controls depth and pace.
• Breasts may leak milk with arousal; feeding or pumping first and keeping a towel nearby helps.
• Talk about it. Agree that either of you can pause at any time. Pain is a signal, not something to push through.
• Pain that lasts more than a few tries, or deep pain, is worth a pelvic floor physical therapy referral (see the pelvic floor guide).

You can get pregnant before your first period

• Ovulation can return as early as about 3-4 weeks after birth if you're not breastfeeding, before any period shows up.
• Experts suggest waiting at least 18 months between a birth and the next pregnancy where you can, and avoiding a gap under 6 months; short gaps carry more risk for parent and baby.
• If you or your partner could conceive, plan birth control before you need it, ideally before you leave the hospital or at your first postpartum contact.

Birth control options after birth

• Implant: can be placed in the hospital or any time after, works for years, fine while breastfeeding.
• IUD (hormonal or copper): can be placed right after the placenta is delivered or at a later visit. Placement right after birth has a higher chance of the IUD slipping out, which your provider will discuss.
• Progestin-only pills or the shot: fine while breastfeeding.
• Pills, patch or ring with estrogen: usually wait at least 3-6 weeks because of the higher risk of blood clots after birth, and longer if you're breastfeeding or have other risk factors. Estrogen may lower milk supply in some people.
• Condoms: any time, and they also protect against infections.
• Breastfeeding as birth control (LAM): highly effective only if all three are true: the baby is under 6 months, your period hasn't returned, and the baby gets only breast milk, feeding often day and night with no long gaps. Once any of these change, use another method.
• Tubal sterilization or vasectomy: permanent options. Tubal procedures can be done during a C-section or soon after a vaginal birth, with paperwork often needed in advance.

When to check in

• Talk about birth control at your postpartum visit or sooner, and about any pain with sex, dryness or low desire that is bothering you.
• If you have sudden severe belly pain with a positive pregnancy test, or one leg becomes swollen, red and painful, contact your provider that day; for chest pain or trouble breathing, call 911.