New Sibling: Homecoming and the First Weeks

Homecoming and visitors

• Have another adult carry the baby in, so the parent's arms are free to hug the older child first.
• A small "gift from the baby" can help the first meeting.
• Ask visitors to greet the older child before the baby.
• A feeding basket with books or a snack turns feeds into cozy time together.

Expect regression

• Baby talk, wanting bottles, potty accidents and sleep trouble are common ways of asking "do you still love me?" Meet the need calmly, without shame or punishment; it usually passes in weeks.
• Let them be little sometimes: rocking, carrying, a turn in your lap.
• If it goes beyond regression (hitting, rejecting a parent, daily meltdowns), see the guide "When Your Toddler Falls Apart After the New Baby Comes Home".

Keep routines steady

• Same bedtime, meals, school and caregivers. Avoid other big changes (a new bed, potty training) for a month or two.

Don't force love or helping

• Offer small jobs (fetch a diaper, pick a song) and let the child say no. Over-praising the "big helper" role can make it feel like a job they must do to be loved.
• Get on their side about the annoying bits: babies cry a lot and can't play yet. "Being a big sister is hard today. That's OK."
• Point out how the baby watches and listens to them: "Look, she's watching you. She loves your voice."

A rough timeline

• There is no fixed timetable — some families find the hardest stretch is the first week, others find jealousy shows once the novelty fades, often a few weeks in. If the hard patch is still worsening after a couple of months, talk to the pediatrician.