# Cry It Out and Graduated Check-Ins: How They Work, Step by Step

> How graduated check-ins and full extinction sleep training work, with sample intervals, what research shows and what to expect.

Stage: baby - Topic: Sleep - Page: https://www.askcladle.com/guides/baby/extinction-and-graduated-sleep-training-step-by-step

Grounded in: AAP HealthyChildren guidance on getting babies to sleep, the American Academy of Sleep Medicine (AASM) review of behavioral treatments for night wakings in young children, and follow-up research on sleep training outcomes. Summarized in Cradle's own words; none of these sources endorse Cradle. General information, not medical advice.

Reviewed: 2026-11

## TLDR

- Graduated check-ins (Ferber) and full extinction (cry it out) often work within 3-7 nights, with more crying at first.
- Research to age 6 found no harm to emotional health or the parent-child bond. No method is required.
- Start around 6 months with the pediatrician's OK, get every caregiver on board, and expect an extinction burst. Safe sleep doesn't change.

## What these methods are

- **Graduated extinction** (often called the Ferber method or "check and console"): you leave
  the room at bedtime and come back for brief, calm check-ins at gradually longer intervals.
- **Full extinction** ("cry it out"): after the routine you leave and don't return until a set
  morning time, except to feed if a night feed is still planned or to deal with illness or safety.
- Both usually work faster than gentle methods, often within 3 to 7 nights, with more crying at
  first.

## What research says

- Studies of graduated and full extinction show they help many babies fall asleep and stay
  asleep, and often improve parents' mood.
- A trial that followed children to age 6 found no differences in emotional health, behavior,
  stress or the parent-child bond compared with families who didn't sleep train.
- No method is required. Choose one your family can carry out consistently, or none at all (see
  the sleep approaches compared and gentle sleep training guides).

## Before you start

- Usually from about 6 months, when the baby is healthy and growing well. Check with the
  pediatrician about night feeds.
- Choose a calm few weeks. Get every caregiver to agree, including the one who wakes up at 2 am.
- Safe sleep doesn't change: on the back, in a bare crib, in a sleep sack.

## Graduated check-ins, step by step

1. Do the bedtime routine, then put the baby in the crib drowsy but awake. Say goodnight and
   leave.
2. If they cry, wait a set time, then go in for a minute or two. Use a calm voice and a pat,
   without picking up, feeding or turning on lights. Then leave, even if they're still crying.
3. Lengthen the waits. A common pattern:
   - Night 1: 3, then 5, then 10 minutes, then every 10 minutes.
   - Night 2: 5, 10, then every 12 minutes.
   - Night 3: 10, 12, then every 15 minutes.
   - Continue adding a few minutes each night.
4. Use the same pattern for night wakings, unless it's a planned feed.
5. Pick shorter intervals if they feel better to you. Consistency matters more than the exact
   numbers.

## Full extinction, step by step

1. Same routine and goodnight. Leave and don't return until the agreed time.
2. Go in only for a planned feed, vomiting, illness, a dirty diaper that needs changing, or a
   safety concern, then settle briefly and leave.

## What to expect

- The first one or two nights are usually hardest. Crying often drops sharply by night 3 or 4.
- An **extinction burst** is common: a night of more crying just as things improve. Stay the
  course.
- Some babies vomit from crying. Clean up calmly with minimal fuss, then continue.

## Common mistakes

- Giving in after a long cry, which teaches that longer crying works.
- Inconsistency between caregivers or between nights and naps.

## When to check in

- Talk with the pediatrician before starting if your baby was born early, has reflux, a medical
  condition or slow weight gain.
- Mention it if crying doesn't ease after about 1 to 2 weeks, or if your baby seems unwell.